Katrína Mogensen
We meet at Katrínas cosy flat on Þingholtsstæti, one of Reykjavíks older and more prestigious streets, on a cold autumn afternoon. She greets me on the steps leading into her flat, from the back garden of the house, wearing a long black embroidered dress, looking ethereal as always. Katrína, or Kata as most call her, is one of these people you can tell was meant to be on a stage. Her presence is so dynamic. Kata has been the singer of Mammút for 15 years and her performances are always very theatrical and full of emotion, she really is a force of nature. You need to see it to experience it. Usually dressed in black and adorned with make up, almost like war paint for her performances.
Kata is expecting her first baby, a boy, this month, with her partner Leifur, who is an artist as well. We immediately talk everything pregnancy and birth related as I myself just had my first baby 4 months ago at the time of interview. It’s such an overwhelming stage of life and most women find it easy to talk about to anyone whom relates, it’s such a defining stage which most can’t fathom what it feels like until it happens.
She tells me the pregnancy was very welcomed, and that she’s wanted to be a mum for a long time now. But we both discuss how even though we both wanted to have children, we didn’t quite anticipate what being pregnant would be like.
How has your pregnancy been so far? Does it live up to all the stereotypes the portray in films and in media?
My pregnancy has been very good to me, I have been able to move and work and travel without any complications. I have not had any special cravings nor have I had the hysterical moodswings as you often see portrayed on tv or in films.
How have you felt doing your work whilst being pregnant? Performing art as well as singing and writing with your band Mammút?
Mammút finished their 5th album this year, in October, It felt very different writing for this album and I think it had a lot to do with me being pregnant. Being on stage was a very powerful feeling. I also worked in theatre in Copenhagen last November, I was directing a piece with my co-worker, artist Sunneva Ása Weisshappel. I felt my pregnancy shaped the work a lot, my attitude has been very calm and I have been trusting situations, ideas and projects more than ever. All though at times I felt that my head is very much up in the clouds and I have had a hard time wrapping it around day to day tasks and responsibilities.
Mammút is over half female members, do you feel that has helped with you being pregnant and working in the music industry? Do you feel women in music meet different expectations than men when expecting children?
Yes I think so, but what surprised me the most was that I felt it from myself. It is amazing and brutal how society penetrates it’s ideas into yours and I felt like it was a very serious thing that I was pregnant and pursuing a career in music. But then again those ideas about having children and being an artist did not come from me, but an outdated and entrenched societal idea. I have no fear about the evolution of my career and life at this point.
In the UK I felt the NHS was made to drive fear into women before giving birth, preparing you for the worst case scenario and how every measure needs to be taken should the baby or mother be in danger during labour. What has it been like being pregnant in Iceland?
When I am afraid of something I tend to research it to pieces, that’s how I feel I get ahead of fear and most of the time the fear then disappears. With the idea of the birth process was like that. I have read every book written by Ina May Gaskin, watched every documentary there is out there about the subject and it surprised me how much education I would get out of being pregnant. About the female body and it’s anatomy and the horrors of how the female body has been treated in the medical institutes through the decades. I feel I have stumbled upon one of the biggest feminist issues out there and it’s absolutely shocking how incredibly successful the patriarchy has been in claiming birth by taking away the trust in the woman’s mind that she is capable of giving birth to her own child without major complications and replace it with fear.
Your sister recently gave birth at home without a midwife there, and people in Iceland felt the right to discuss her decision to do so to an extraordinary degree. Have you thought of how you wish to give birth under your ideal circumstances? What do you feel about peoples need to discuss each woman’s decision about how she chooses to give birth
My sister had a wonderful birth, alone with her partner at home. She published her birth story and it is a very beautiful story, but I feel people are not used to these stories in the media. I think society is addicted to stories about abuse, violence and loss and people get more shocked by the reading about the wonderful things in life than the horrible.
Women were taking my sisters story very personally and they felt she was judging their own births and many were eager to talk about their personal traumas and situations that went wrong and wanted my sister to be discredited and a shamed for her personal decision.
It did not really surprise me at all as I feel this is the perfect recipe of what is going wrong in our modern day womanhoods. We have to learn to distinguish between the judgement of individuals and their choices, and criticism of our society and the entrenched systems within it. If things are to change for the better we have to abandon the fragility that comes with taking everything personally.
What is your opinion on breastfeeding and your right to do it or wish not to? Do you plan on doing it for as long as possible?
In my mind it has never been a question not to breastfeed, I feel like my womb is producing a baby while my breasts produce milk and I see it as this sacred combo that I can’t ignore. I love seeing toddlers breastfeeding, I am looking forward to it and can easily picture myself with a 2 year old still getting some milk. Mothers are shamed for bottle feeding and for extended breastfeeding, it seems no matter what you do someone is going to take it as a personal attack so no-one can win in these situations.
People say motherhood will bring so many new perspectives to your life, but what new perspectives have you already gained knowing you’re about to become one?
I have had this very strong feeling of calmness and that things are as they should be. I have been longing to be a mother and to carry a baby for as long as I can remember myself, so I feel very grateful as well. Going through a pregnancy is very much about trusting life, because I also feel like death is a little bit closer. Trusting this process has definitely given me a new perspective on life.
During my pregnancy I was so mind blown about the lengths our bodies go to carry and nurture our babies. What has been the most shocking change to you or your body through pregnancy? And what is something you wished people might have warned you about?
I think I was warned so much about so many things that the pregnancy has felt more natural then I thought it would. But then again I’ve realised how different every pregnancy is for each individual woman.
Except one thing, I feel like I have been kicked in the crotch a few times now that I am only a few days away from the due date!
Do you feel a need to keep up the idea that being pregnant is such a wonderful experience, as social media and todays portrayal of pregnancy tends to emphasize it is?
My opinion is that there are so many more horror stories and misconceptions about pregnancy and birth present in our society then there are powerful stories. I see much more fear and lack of curiosity about this process. Midwives are being discredited In most societies and more interventions are being normalised without any questions asked. I think there is something sacred about these nine months and I am pretty sure every woman feels it, whether it is that you go through a rough pregnancy or a gentle process, there is something holy there, something deeply unexplainable and I think we should start claiming this secret power we women possess.
Do you feel like the dialogue in todays society about becoming a mother and being pregnant is truthful to the experience you’ve had so far as a pregnant woman and knowing new mums?
It’s hard for to pinpoint what the dialouge is specifically. On the one hand, you have the mother with baby poop and spit up her shirt that hasn’t slept in months and only dreams of escape, and on the other, the mother who ‘’claimed her body back’’ a week after birth and eats chia pudding with fresh fruit all day and is in constant ecstasy. I think there is a lack of vulnerability and reverence for this chapter in life that pregnancy and motherhood is. I am surrounded by beautiful mothers, all very different in their ways and I know they are making all the right choices for their babies. We all have our own truth.
Have you found yourself having to research a great deal to find out how to deal with your changing and growing body or have you let nature lead the way more?
I was given a book early on in my pregnancy called “Birth Matters” and it really opened up my mind for more research. I have heard that people research more about the cars they are about to buy then they do about their choices in pregnancy and birth. I found so much about this issue so much more political and complex then I ever could have imagined. It has sparked an interest in me that goes beyond pregnancy and motherhood.
What have you learned so far about yourself and what has left you most in awe of your body?
I am in awe of the fearlessness I have experienced but that has also to do with reading about your body and listening to it. This is a very good lesson in letting go and trusting a process, and I have been enjoying that challenge.
How do you feel about your transition so far and how are you anticipating your new role will be like once your child arrives?
I am gonna stay in bed for at least a week after giving birth. That is one of the thing I have decided, I am going to dive into this bubble I have been told that arrives and really nest in it. I am not eager to keep up any particular pace. I am very lucky I can allow myself this time and space for his arrival.
Words and photography by Lilja Hrönn.
